11 1 / 2013

I know it’s been a while since i’ve been around. I went back to school last summer and have been super busy. Got myself a new bf too :) yay for getting regular amazing sex! lol. You wouldn’t think it would be so hard for a stripper to get laid. You would be wrong. Well, if it was just about sex, then obviously I have my pick of tons of men. But the fact of the matter is, I’m not sleeping with my clients. I wasn’t dating or looking for a bf, and I may be one of the few women left who isn’t into random sex or one nighters. I completely lack the ability to sleep with someone and not develop feelings for them. Which is the reason I do not have a man i can dial for a booty call. I have many to choose from if I wanted, but what is the point of sex if you lack that connection in the first place? I’m in my 30’s, so it’s not like I haven’t jumped into bed with a cute guy quickly back in the day, but I’ve learned it’s really not what I want at the end of the day. There is definitely such a thing as bad sex, and no its not like pizza, where when its bad its still good. If it’s bad, it’s just bad! And I will not be coming back for more! LOL. I actually went about 10 months without having sex. That is the longest since I lost my virginity at the age of 13. It definitely wasn’t easy, and I had even tried to post a profile on a dating site, thinking I should look for a regular booty call. I have to say I definitely don’t regret not meeting anyone, because the sex I have with my boyfriend now is the most mind blowing, amazing, beautiful connection I have ever had with anyone. The absolute best sex is the passionate, can’t get enough of each others mouths, bodies, skin, and everything just absolutely tingles and vibrates with energy from inside. I could nibble and taste every part of him……getting carried away! haha

I know most people think strippers probably have the kinkiest and dirtiest sex. I can’t speak for all, but I find most of us are actually more reserved in the bedroom. Just because we may help a client fulfill their fantasies, these are not our fetishes and it is after all, a job. Not to say, I haven’t tried many things, and i consider myself open in the bedroom, but I have definitely had some super strange fetishes with some of my ex bfs. Some so strange Im not even comfortable even talking about it!

One of the strangest fetishes I’ve ever come across was an ex bf who told me he liked wearing diapers. Apparently he did this often, and he has had the fantasy of being fed by a bottle and being swaddled and have me “mommy” him. Ya, definitely couldn’t deal with that one. This was not something I had any interest in even trying. He sent me a link online with some info into this community of adults who like to be swaddled and diapered. No judgements if that is your thing, but I am actually a mom. I have an 8 year old son. And that was just too much for me! I have difficutly associating anything sexual with being a mother. And yes, this was sort of a sexual gratification thing for him. As you can guess, he had a lot of mommy issues. And although it wasn’t a deal breaker, we didnt last too long after that! lol.

31 5 / 2012

Since I have been dancing for over 13 years, I have obviously had many clients. There is one I have known since I started all those years ago. We had lost touch when I had quit all those years ago. But with the wonders of the internet and facebook, it was easy for my to find him when I had decided to return to the industry. Other than that, most of my clients I have known for at least a year. Some have been very good to me the last few years, but I in return have been very good to them as well.

I love my regular clients. They make the industry. If it was’t for them, I would be doing the daily hustle. Talking to strangers as they come into my club, hoping they will be a little generous and spend some time and money on me. That is possibly the shittiest part of the job. Most people couldn’t even imagine walking up to perfect strangers, and trying to intice them to pay for some naked visuals and stimulation up in the vip. This how we make out money though, and I have met each of my regular clients this way. We chat, make small talk, and hopefully make a real connection with our potential clients. No matter what these other dancers think, or try to say, without a real connection, it is hard to keep a client interested beyond the few times they come to see you. Its about the long term. I have regulars clients I have known for a few years. I do sometimes look forward to seeing them. It means I will most likely have a bunch of drinks, and make a bunch of money. All good things. Plus my nights are easy with regular clients, this means guarenteed money.

Many people would be shocked at the regularity of zero nights at work. This means I walk into work having spent more money than I have made. How is this possible you ask? How can a stripper not be making money??? This is how the business is now. If you don’t have a regular client lined up to come in and see you, you are just hoping to meet a generous guy. Otherwise, you have to talk to every guy who walks in the bar. I am way past this point in my entertainment career. Which definitely works against me. Afterall, how would I know if a guy is interested unless I talk to him? i guess this is where my experience in his industry counts for a lot. I’m sure if I went around and spoke to every single guy i the room I would definitely make at least a little bit. But I find that to be tiring, emotionally draining, and at times it is demeaning. I guess what I’m trying to say is, I profile the guys as i see them. And I have a type. It makes my life easier, and in reality, it will always be quality over quantity. I could leave the club having made $400 off of one guy, or 6. Now that shit you can only learn over time.

I may look like I’m sitting at the bar, maybe a bit stuck up because I’m not walking around and hustling my ass off. But I’m actually just watching. And waiting. For that right customer to walk in and catch my eye. …

21 12 / 2011

Like, WTF? You don’t go into a store, get a pack of smokes, and not pay for them. This is NOT ok! How could you think you can get away with not paying???

I was in the VIP talking to one my bouncer friends. We’ll call him Big D. I’ve known Big D for a very long time. We started working together at another club, about 12 years ago. He has always had my back. And so, whenever he helps me out, I always tip him. I tip out any bouncer/security that helps me out. That should be the norm though. Anyways, I don’t usually get into into situations with my customers, mostly because I don’t rip them off. Ok. Well, I guess sometimes I may exaggerate the number of songs by one or two. But most guys are happy to tip anyways…. getting back to the story. I was talking to Big D, when a half naked stripper came up to us, along with her douchebag customer, claiming he was refusing to pay her. He looked at Big D, and said “I’m not paying her. There’s no way I’m paying her. She didn’t even give me a handjob!” . Big D looked at him, and basically told him, that wasn’t an issue that pertains to the girl or the club. The fact is, the man took the dancer to the vip, she proceeded to take off her clothes and dance for him for 5 songs. That equals to $100. It is $20 a song.  We haven’t changed or raised the price in 15 years. The asshole actually said he wouldn’t pay her because he didn’t cum! Big D was awesome though, he said, “If she was going to give you a hand job or blow you, she would’ve started right away. If she wasn’t giving you what you wanted, why did you keep on going?” He had her for about 20 mins. The guy had absolutely no response, but still refused to pay. Big D called the manager who came up to help resolve the issue. The asshole actually had the balls, to accuse the manager of “taking a cut of the money” and said that they were scamming him. Ummmm seriously?? It’s a strip club. If we were scamming you, it wouldn’t be for $100!! Don’t be a moron! In the end, Big D got him to pay up. The guy swore he would never step foot in our club again. But here’s the thing, we don’t want clients like that in our club anyway! You know what you are getting into when you come to the strip club. You know that it can get expensive, so really guys, when you come to the club, remember that you gotta pay to play!!!! Come prepared to have fun, but come with some fucking money!!!! And don’t be a total douche because you didn’t get what you wanted. If you aren’t happy with the girl on your lap, trade her for the next one! But make sure you pay her for the time she spent with you. Time is money! and Strippers ain’t cheap! (well, most aren’t anyway!)

21 12 / 2011

In this business, it’s definitely hard to tell who your real friends are. There is constantly drama. Even when you do your best to avoid confrontational situations, drama can arise, simply because you didn’t come forward with information that is none of your goddamn business. 

I believe myself to be one of the calmer more down to earth girls among my peers. Although that isn’t saying much! I can get rowdy with the rest of them! But when friendships develop from alcohol and drug fueled conversations, I guess you really can’t expect too much. Don’t get me wrong, I really do love my girls, but more often than not, they will disappoint you. It’s a sad reality. What’s even sadder, in my self realization, I don’t really have any friends outside of the stripping industry. You become so caught up with everything, the money, the craziness, the party, that you fail to nourish relationships outside of that little bubble. Most of my friends are in long term relationships, but stable is something that most of them are not. The few girlfriends I have outside of this business I either met while dancing, or they were also dancers themselves once. It’s hard to step back and get some perspective. With all the backstabbing and shit talking going on, it’s getting harder to see clearly. Beyond all the bullshit. 

These girls, are so used to hustling everyday, they get used to hustling everyone. And I guess it becomes who you are. Actually getting to know someone in this business for who they are, and not what they portray is next to non existent. Most of them are selfish, individuals, who never think of anyone but themselves. It comes with the territory, being adored, and having tons of men spend money on you simply because you give them a little attention, mixed with some nudity. So many girls become the strippers they portray themselves to be. 

I guess I should mention that I’m not an aggressive person. Not passive aggressive either. I try and keep things mellow, and I don’t like to call people out. I get along with most people, and at times, have developed pretty great friendships with certain people. I have tolerated some girls, simply because I am close to their friends. For example, when I came back to the industry, I met and became friends with a girl I will call A. I had met her through my best friend at the time. Also a previous dancer. A and I spent so much time together, I called her my wifey. We hung out with guys we liked, made money together, partied together, and even went out to dinner with our kids. The problem is, A is friends with a girl I will call Evil Conniving Bitch, or ECB for short. I had also met ECB through my best friend, who at the time I hadn’t realized was very similar in personality to ECB. My gripe is, why don’t these girls see how much of a cunt she really is? ECB manipulates and backstabs everyone and always gets away with it. Really frustrating. 

I seem to be maturing in the last couple of months though. It might have something to do with turning 30. A has changed. She recently had a baby, and is definitely not the same person anymore. She is always with ECB, so I decided, instead of being a hater, and constantly talk about these bitches, I will just stay away. I was there for A as much as I possibly could be, but in the end, why make time in your life for someone who won’t make time for you? She would much rather be spending her time with someone who isn’t a good person. And I’m learning to value the real people I have in my life. 

I was disappointed on Sunday night. It was my 30th birthday celebration. I got sick and cancelled the big bash I had planned at a night club. Picture 15 dancers, bottle service in a night club, with stripper poles. Yep. Would’ve been a shit show. Of course it sucked that I was sick, so I decided to invite everyone over to hang out. Imagine how shitty I felt, when only 5 people out of the 20 showed up. Even the people I was SO SURE were coming. Some didn’t even text me or bother responding to my messages. Well, lesson learned. On top of everything else, ECB was gloating about it on fb. Claiming ‘what goes around comes around. Fake people got faked out! LOL’. I know she was directing it at me. So, to be the bigger person, instead of starting a status war, I deleted her. That woke me up. Get rid of the poisonous people in my life. The joke about it is, she sent me a friend request the next day. Talk about fake!!!

20 12 / 2011

No, not to the world of stripping. To blogging. This is my very first blog post. So I will do my best to make it coherent and entertaining. So I guess I should start off by telling you a bit about me…

I’m an Asian exotic dancer who lives in the T dot. My 30th birthday is coming up, so I’ve been around for a bit. I started dancing when I was 18, but had quit by the age of 22. Went and had a ‘normal life’. Worked as a bartender, retail manager, etc. But in the last couple of years, I decided to come back, and maybe save a bit of money so I could head back to school. For the time being though, this is my chosen work, and sometimes, I love it. The freedom of choosing when to work, making money, and having fun while doing it, is an addiction in itself. 

I might also add, that I used to be a fairly big party girl. I’ve slowed down quite a bit recently, as being drunk and high is not appealing to me as it used to. I love pot, and will forever be a pothead, but as for chemicals and hard substances, I’ve left them behind with my 20s. And it feels pretty fantastic. Being in the business I’m in though, cocaine still runs the show. In the end, it’s always about money, how you make yours, is up to you.

There are a few different types of strippers. The ‘clean dancers’ are girls who don’t provide services to the clients. That’s right. There are still many strippers, who won’t fuck or suck, but still provide clients with a sexy and unforgettable experience. I am one of these girls. It’s about playing the game, being seductive and saying all of the right things. Of course, there are hookers. These girls are pretty much willing to give you whatever you want if the price is right. Many of them are not above making deals or cutting each others grass. But that’s another rant for another day. And then, there are the girls who ride the line between naughty girl and dirty whore. LOL. These girls, are pretty damn close to being nasty bitches, even though they don’t provide services to the clients. 

That being said, I still do well. I mean, the economy sucks ass, no one has the extra cash they used to, but I still have regular clients who come to see me often. They are the bread and butter of ALL dancers. I mean, that’s what it’s all about! 

Sometimes though, when the night is quiet, and you don’t have any good customers, it’s all about the girls. We become quite close. They are my work family. I see them as often as I see my hubby. And many of them, are pretty great friends. But when you put together, 40 women who work in the same club, day in and day out, mix in booze, weed, and hard drugs, there is always drama. It follows you around like a fart you can’t get away from…. 

Anyway, this was sooo much easier than I thought… there will be many stories and craziness to come.